Everything Has Changed
by books-are-better
Summary: Peeta has been reeling for the last three years, left by the one person in the world he loved. He's tried so many times to get over her, but nothing seemed to help. Then without any notice, the woman who broke him is back in his life with a secret that will change everything. Modern Day, AU.
1. Chapter 1

"Oh, god, Peeta, YES!"

The name-less, face-less chick moans my name, and I feel her clench around me, an orgasm hitting her again. I continue to pump myself into her, not quite there yet. She's pretty enough, with medium length dirty blonde hair, spread out on her pink pillow, but I'm tired of meaningless sex. I mean, yeah, it feels great, but it's boring. I want the love again.

I pick up my pace, pounding her deep and hard, ready to get this over with. One, two, three, and I slam her hard, and spill myself into the condom, filling the tip. I immediately roll off of her and lie on my back. She crawls up my side and leans her head on my bare chest.

"God, you're so good. I came three times," she pants, kissing my pec and running her right hand up and down my stomach.

"Um, thanks," I mumble. "It was good for me too." I guess. But not as good as _her_. I push thoughts for her out of my head and turn my face back to the chick who's naked next to me. I lean in a kiss her pink lips, swollen from our previous acts.

"I have to go, actually," I say. I tuck a piece of her hair behind her ear. "I'm really sorry."

I slip out of bed and begin to dress, grabbing my clothes from all over her room. It was kind of a frenzied thing, and she basically jumped me as soon as I walked into the bar. It literally took her ten minutes before we were leaving and heading back to her place; she was an eager one. I pull the condom off and discard it in the garbage before pulling on my boxers and then my jeans.

"Uh, okay." I look over to her, pulling up the covers to hide her bare chest. "Do you want to call me so we can do this again sometime?

I nod. "Absolutely, Meg." Not.

She frowns. "It's Madge." I cringe. Fuck.

"I'm really sorry." And I am. I'm sure she's a wonderful girl, maybe a little slutty, and I wish that I wanted to be with her for more than one night. I wish I wanted to be with anyone for more than one night. I crawl back on the bed and kiss her again, swiping my tongue along her bottom lip—trying to make up for my mistake. I pull away and she smiles at me. I take a sigh of relief. "I had a great time, don't worry." When did lying get so easy for me? I used to hate lying, and now I seem to do it every time I meet a girl.

She smiles brightly and I move back off the bed and head to her door. I give her a quick wave and duck out, without any intention of ever seeing her again.

* * *

"So, how was it?" Gale asks as soon as I walk through the door. He's sitting on the couch, going over the lyrics of one of his new songs. He's a lyricist, not really in front of the microphone, but behind it—and he's incredibly good at it. I mean, he basically bought this three bedroom house for the two of us, and I just pay him for utilities and cable. He glances at the clock and sees that it's barely 1:00 a.m.; he hisses. "Not good, I guess. Struck out?"

I shake my head. "Nah, I got the jackpot. But the kind where you win tokens and not coins. She was pretty enough, but…"

"She's not her," Gale finishes for me. I nod. He knows me too well.

Gale and I have been roommates since we met our freshman year at Panem University. And even though we're graduates, and have been for two years, we still room together—unable to get out of the pattern. But best friends don't have to grow out of anything—I think that's kind of the point. They are there with you for the hard stuff, but they've also been with you through the immature stuff—and that is the stuff you want remember the most. Like when we egged our professor's car for giving Gale a D or when Gale streaked through the park, past a group of third graders.

"Dude, I know you've heard me say this a billion times, and as much as I don't want to say it again, I will," he says, setting down his usual glass of bourbon onto our scratched, wooden coffee table. "You should try to find someone better than _her_." He runs his hand through his messy brown hair.

I shake my head. "There's no such person," I whisper.

Gale rolls his eyes. "Peet, I love you bro, but it's been almost three years!"

"She was the one, Gale. And she ran away—scared of her feelings. And now she's half across the country." I cross my arms over my chest. "You just don't understand."

Gale stands up off the couch. "You're right. I don't." He exits the living room, shaking his head and taking his glass with him, and into his bedroom.

I head to my room too and begin to shed my clothes for bed. You can't just "get over" your soul mate. And sure, we had some issues—I mean, she was sullen and moody and outspoken and I was the opposite—but we balanced each other out. Love does that to you. I believe if you love someone, truly love them, then the faults just fade away. You find the ability to look over them or embrace them. Because they are it for you. And I thought she was it for me.

When I'm just in my boxers, I crawl under my covers and try to fall asleep; but all I see is her face. Laughing, kissing my cheek, nuzzling my neck, whispering "I love you" into my ear, glaring at me with her beautiful grey eyes. She was broken, but we were broken together. Her beauty overshadowed everyone on this God forsaken place we call earth.

She was my best friend.

* * *

The grocery store is empty the next morning and I wander effortlessly through the aisles, grabbing things off our mile long list. Gale and I don't really go shopping that often so when we do, we buy out the whole store—our cart filled to the brim. I grab two boxes of cheerios and turn down the produce aisle. I have to finish all the shopping and a few other errands before work, but I've still got five hours. I own a bakery a few blocks from mine and Gale's house. It was handed down to me by my father when he passed away a few years ago, and though I have two older brothers, none of them were interested in taking up the family business. But I was and always had been; it's all I've ever wanted to do. And my bitch of a mom has been gone for years, so why would my Dad pass it to her? Especially after how she's treated us while we grew up.

I lean down to grab a head of lettuce when a flicker out of the corner of my eye causes me to look up. I look down the aisle and see _her_. My breath hitches. What is she doing here? I thought she was supposed to be in Los Angeles, not in Dumb-Fuck, Virginia.

"Katniss?" I ask, incredulously. The beautiful woman looks over to me, her chocolate braid flipping around her head.

"Peeta?" Her beautiful lips form my name and I feel my pulse spike, just like it did when we were together. I've been in love with her since I was a kid, but she never even gave me the time of day until our Freshman year of college when Gale and I happened to take Psych 101 with her. When she smiled at me for the first time, the whole world made sense, and I knew I would never be the same. And I haven't.

I stand back up, step away from the food and walk down the aisle towards her. She's holding a small child in her arms, but I don't focus on that. All I see is her. It's been over two and a half years since I've seen Katniss, the person I thought I would love forever. And I know I will, but her forever didn't seem to be as long as mine.

"How are you?" I ask when I finally reach her. All I want to do is tuck the stray piece of hair that's fallen from her braid behind her ear—like I've done a thousand times before. But I can't anymore. And it kills me.

She smiles shyly and my heartbeat practically becomes audible. "I'm good. How are you?" She shifts the girl onto her right hip and my eyes flicker to the little girl momentarily.

"Good. I'm good too." I grin at her, then smile at the little girl. "And who's this?" I ask, reaching out my hand to the little girl. The girl giggles and buries her face in Katniss's neck. I laugh.

"This is Prim."

My eyes widen. "Like your sister?" She nods her head. Katniss's sister died when Katniss was just a teenager. Her sister was only twelve. She never talked to anyone about it—except me. There was a fire one night when Prim was staying at her best friend's house and she was trapped; her friend died too. My heart beats in my chest, nervous adrenaline running through my veins. If her name is Prim…

"So she's yours?" I ask. Again, she nods her head.

"Prim, this is Peeta," she says. Prim removes her head and looks at me again. I reach out my hand again and tickle her side. She giggles, thrashing around in Katniss's arm, her blond hair flying about.

"How old is she?" I ask, grinning. This little girl is so cute. It almost makes me forget that the love of my life has another man's child.

"Almost two," she whispers, her eyes casting downward, avoiding my gaze. My eyebrows pull together. Two? I look back at Prim. Her hair is very dirty blonde, curls sticking up haphazardly all over her head. She has high cheekbones like Katniss and her same nose and same long eyelashes. But it's the eyes I focus on. They are bright blue and eerily familiar.

"Katniss?" I look away from the little girl and back to the girl I've loved since I was six.

She nibbles on her bottom lip, something she's always done when she's nervous. After what seems like a thousand years, she releases her lip and looks up at me—her grey eyes warm like summer storm.

"She's yours."

* * *

**I've had this story in my head and hidden on my computer for a long time and I've finally decided to publish it. I hope you all enjoy it!**

**Tumblr: ****_books-are-better_**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all for your support! I hope I can live up to all your kind words and expectations! And I'm thinking this Fic is going to be 12-15 chapters, in case you were wondering. Enjoy!**

* * *

Oddly enough, anger isn't the first emotion I feel. I look away from Katniss's open, wary eyes—she's waiting for me to freak out—and back to her child. _Our _child. The little girl's blues eyes are staring into mine, so kind and innocent and pure. I say the first thing that pops into my head.

"Can I hold her?"

Katniss visibly relaxes and nods her head. She removes Prim from her hip and gives her to me. The little one immediately snuggles into my side and looks up at me, popping her thumb in her mouth. I can't help the grin that takes over my face.

She's so beautiful, just like her mother. Except her hair. That's a Mellark trait if I've ever seen one: crazy blonde curls that refuse to be tamed. I look away from her delicate, small features and back to Katniss. She's leaning against her cart, disbelief etched into her face.

"Shit, I always knew you guys looked alike, but seeing you again…and holding her…" she trails off, shaking her head. She looks down at her feet and makes a scuff mark on the floor with her brown leather boots—the ones she's had for years.

"Why didn't you tell me about her?" I ask, looking back at Prim. I tuck a blonde curl behind her ear and she giggles again. I begin to trail my fingers along her features, just taking her in; her small straight nose; her wide, open sapphire eyes; her scarlet cheeks; her thin, dirty blonde eyebrows; her small, square chin. I'm in awe, there's no other way to put it. She's _mine_.

"I don't know," Katniss finally says as I'm running my thumb along Prim's rosy lips, the little girl giggling against my skin. "I mean, I had just broken up with you and I was stupid and freaking out and in a new city."

I look back at her. "Why are you back here?" I ask. Not that I'm mad about that; happiness for this beautiful miracle my arms is all I can feel right now.

"I missed home; and I was offered at job in town." She sighs deeply. "And, of course, there's you."

I raise my eyebrows. "Me?"

She points to Prim. "You needed to know about her. Growing up without a father sucks and I…"

"You don't want that for her," I finish. She nods. Katniss's father died when she was ten. And I hated it. This incredible woman had gone through too much pain in her life, first with her father and then with her sister, and I wanted to remove all of it. But she pushed me away.

"I'm glad you did but, why did you," I struggle to find the right words, "_keep_ her?" Her eyes widen and panicking, I qualify my statement. "Because I know you never wanted kids. And you especially didn't want to raise them on your own."

She relaxes against her cart again, shaking her head. "I just couldn't do it. I wanted to, I hate to admit that, but I did. I went to the clinic three different times. But I just couldn't go through with it." She looks away from me and back to Prim, a soft smile forming on her effortlessly stunning face; she wears not even a spot of make-up. Never has. Katniss has never had to do anything to make her so completely gorgeous than to just wake up. And she doesn't even have to do that; even sleeping she's stunning. "And then I thought that maybe she could be my new start; my new family after losing mine."

"I wanted to be that for you," I tell her honestly, looking at Prim again. I play with her little toes peeking out from her tiny crisscross sandals.

"I know you did," she mumbles back.

My head flies back to her, anger finally making an appearance. "Then why didn't you let me?!"

"Peeta, stop!" She uses her stern voice, the one she only uses when she's trying not to yell. She narrows her eyes at me. "We are not talking about this in the middle of a grocery store."

"So you get to decide everything?" The malice for her, I'm now discovering, runs deep in my veins. And it's ready to make its appearance.

She takes a step closer to me and pushes her finger in my chest. "Enough," she growls. I want to tell her to go fuck herself, that she's not in control of me anymore. But Prim's face snuggles into my neck and I back down immediately. I turn back to her in my arms and see her eyelids begin to droop. Warmth rushes through me like a tidal wave and I look over at Katniss just in time to see her eyes soften.

"Can we go somewhere and talk about this?" I ask, nodding my head down to the sleepy girl in my arms. My little girl.

She clenches her teeth, but nods curtly.

God, even when she's pissed she's the most beautiful person on this planet.

* * *

I buy the groceries I've already put in my cart and quickly drive home to drop them off, blowing off my other errands. Hell, I just found out I had a kid; dry cleaning can wait. I get back into my car and drive to the address Katniss gave me. It's about a two miles past the bakery, in a suburb at the edge of town. The house that I pull up is a small stone cottage-like home with a cobblestone walkway and a red hybrid in the driveway.

I practically sprint up the walkway, which is lined with an assortment of flowers and shrubs, each blossom small and bursting with multicolored petals. But before I even knock on the dark green oak door, Katniss opens it and brings her pointer finger in front of her lips.

"Prim's sleeping," she whispers as she waves me in. I nod and walk over the threshold. The living room is spacious, with deep red walls and cream carpet. Brown leather furniture is placed chaotically around the room and boxes are stacked precariously around the furniture. And of course, just like you would expect from Katniss, bookshelves everywhere.

"When did you move?" I ask, walking over to the large couch and sitting down. She sets down a baby monitor on the glass coffee table in front of the couch, and then sits next to me, folding her knees under herself.

"Two days ago," she mumbles, playing with the end of her braid. "I was going to finish unpacking and then contact you, but then…" she trails off. She does that a lot. Because she knows that I understand her—better than anyone else. I've always been able to figure out what she means when she can't say the words.

"I've missed you so much," I tell her, unable to keep it in any longer. I lean in closer to her and lift my hand to her face to cup her face; I run my thumb along her high cheekbone like I've done a million times before. Her olive skin is just as smooth and flawless as I remember.

So fast, she closes the space between us and presses her lips against mine. I'm stiff against her, shocked to say the least, but her lips capture my bottom one and I automatically pull her closer to me; one hand at her back and one hand still on her face. And I kiss her back with everything that I am. Her soft lips meld with mine perfectly and I hold back the moan that threatens to escape from my throat.

But when she goes to slip her tongue into my mouth, I pull away, shaking my head. I can't get sucked into this. I need answers.

"Why did you leave me?" I choke, forgetting the kiss, forgetting the warmth of her body. Tears burn my eyes, ready to fall.

"Peeta…" she trails off once again and moves her face back to mine, going in for a kiss. But I can't do this. I pull away and stand up off the couch, officially done with her head games. She's always done this; distracts me with kisses and sex when there are serious issues we need to discuss. She's an avoider.

"No. We need to talk about this. You broke my fucking heart, Katniss." I run my hands through my hair and she looks at me, her silver eyes welling with tears. "And now your back and you're looking at me like that again, something I've been dreaming about for almost three years, and all I want to do is kiss you and make love for hours like we used to. But we can't—I can't." I take a deep breath and continue, "I want to be a part of Prim's life. She's my daughter and I want to be her father. I'll move in if it would be easier or whatever. I'll do anything. I want her."

Katniss stares at me, chewing her bottom lip. I'm not sure what part of the speech made her particularly nervous, but here she is—chewing on her bottom lip. Finally, she stands up off the couch and stalks towards me. She wraps her arms around my waist and presses her body to mine, resting her head on my chest.

"I've missed you, too," she whispers. I encircle my arms around her and set my forehead on the top of her head. We fit together perfectly—like two puzzle pieces. I've always known that, always felt that I was missing a part of myself when she was gone.

After a few minutes, she pulls her head away and looks up at me. Her silver eyes slice into my heart, picking at the scab that she left when she broke it. "You can stay here a few days a week. There's a spare room and we can set up an air mattress or something."

I nod. That sounds reasonable. But of course she didn't say why she left me; I guess I'll put it off for now. So I ask a question I know she will answer: "Will you tell me about Prim?"

A grin takes over her face, making her look happier than I've ever seen her. "She's perfect, Peeta," she says simply. "She's sweet and quiet and happy all the time. She loves attention and her favorite animal is the elephant. And her favorite color is orange—just like you." Her eyes twinkle and she licks her lips. God, she's beautiful. "She hates bananas but loves blueberries, and only drinks milk."

"Does she still?" I point down to Katniss's chest. She laughs, covering her mouth to stay quiet, and shakes her head. I let out a small chuckle too, embarrassed.

"God, Peeta, no. She hasn't done that for over six months. I meant regular milk—like from a cow and a carton." She rolls her eyes at me.

"What's her middle name?" I ask, pulling away from her entirely and sitting back down on the couch. Katniss joins me, nibbling on her lip again. I reach over and pull it out from her teeth. "Don't do that today. Just tell me what you're thinking and don't be nervous about my reaction."

She nods. "Her middle name is…Lucy."

My eyes widen. "You remembered?" I ask, surprised. Lucy is the name I told her I wanted to name my daughter, if I ever had one. I think it's so simple, yet so beautiful.

She nods again. "I remember everything."

This time I reach for her and pull her into my arms. I can't believe she did that. God, I love her. I will always love her. Her hands weave into my hair as she hugs me back, just like she used to.

"Mama?"

A small voice rings out through the baby monitor and we pull apart. Instantly, Katniss stands and I scramble up to join her.

"Can I come with you?" I ask, grabbing her arm as she turns to leave. She gives me a small smile, nodding softly, and I follow her as she leaves the living room. She walks down a hall with the same red walls as the living room and opens the door at the end of it.

We walk in and find Prim sitting up in her crib, chewing on a tiny stuffed animal elephant. I can't help but grin at her. I've only known her for two minutes, but I know I love her. She's perfect. Just like her mother.

"Primmy, how was your nap?" Katniss picks up the little girl and kisses her cheek before holding her to her side.

"I wan boo-berries!" Prim squeals. Then she looks over at me. Katniss follows her gaze.

"Do you remember Peeta? From the store?" she asks.

Prim nods her head and throws up her arms, almost smacking Katniss on the side of her head. "Pee-da!" she screeches loudly.

Katniss smiles at her. "Remember to use your inside voice, sweetie," she says. "But yes, Peeta's here for dinner." Prim turns her head away from me and back to her mom.

"Boo-berries?"

I laugh. God, she's adorable.

"Yes, blueberries and other stuff too." Katniss takes a few steps towards me. "Here, hang out with Peeta while I get dinner ready." She hands Prim over to me and I smile at her.

"Hey, I have work in about two hours," I tell her, remembering. I kind forgot with the whole discovering I have a child I didn't know about thing.

She nods. "Okay, I'll make something quick. And if you want, you could stop by after you are done." She twirls her braid around her finger. "We still have some stuff to talk about."

I nod. "Absolutely. I'd love to."

She kisses Prim on the cheek and exits the room, leaving the two of us alone. I look down at Prim and find her smiling at me; I smile back.

"Pee-da!" she calls again.

"Primmy!" I call back. She giggles.

I look around the room and spot some toys in the corner. "Do you want to play?" I ask, but she shakes her head and points to a bookshelf in the shape of a cupcake in the opposite corner.

"So-ry!"

I walk over to the bookshelf and crouch down to look at the selection. After a few seconds, I find one of my favorites as a kid and pull it out. I move to the rocking chair with a flowered quilt draped over the back that is positioned next to the books and sit down. I shift Prim so she's sitting on my lap and able to see the pictures.

"My favoride!" she squeals and leans her head back against my chest. I can't help the tears that prick in the corner of my eyes and the grin that takes over my face. It's her favorite too.

And slowly, I begin to read to my daughter for the first time.

* * *

**Tumblr: ****_books-are-better_**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hope you guys like this chapter! I have a feeling you will...Enjoy!**

* * *

"I have a daughter!"

I'm shouting into the phone, which I know pisses Gale off, but I can't help it. I couldn't wait until I saw him again in person before I told him. I dialed his number as soon as I hopped into the car after work, heading back to Katniss's house.

Gale curses. "Shit, man, I'm so sorry. Please don't tell me it was that one chick Delly you fucked last year. Jesus, she was a nightmare. So clingy and annoying."

I roll my eyes, though I know he can't see me. "No, it's not Delly. It's Katniss!"

"Who-niss?"

"Katniss, man! Katniss fucking Everdeen!" I scream, slamming my fist onto the steering wheel, a grin on my face.

I have a daughter! And she's amazing. So damn smart. I'm pretty sure reading and eating dinner with her was the highlight of my life. She's seriously the perfect combination of Katniss and me; she possesses the best of both of our personalities.

"Wait, what?!" He yells so loud I have to take the phone away from my ear.

"Katniss? The love of my life? Does that ring a bell? She's back in town, for good it seems like, I ran into her at the grocery store this morning. And she has a daughter! My daughter! Fuck, she looks exactly like me. And her. Both of us!" Happiness runs through my veins. I'm on cloud nine right now. Even my employees noticed. Johanna—who's actually older than me—interrogated me like a little kid; but I didn't say anything. I wanted to tell Gale first.

"She has a kid? And she kept it from you? What a bitch."

"Huh?" Gale is kind of killing my buzz.

"Peeta, she kept a child from you, for over two years. Some might even say the most important years in a child's life. And you missed them. How are you not pissed right now?" Gale's voice is incredulous and full of anger.

"I, uh—"

"Let me guess, you didn't think about it like that? You were just excited to see her again and find out you have a child. Shit, Peeta, you've always wanted a family of your own." I can practically see him running a hand through his hair, like he always does when he's exasperated.

"Kinda."

Gale lets out an angry breath. "Look, I'm not telling you how to feel, but man, don't you wish you could have seen the birth? Or hear her first word?"

I'm silent as I pull in front of Katniss's house and turn off the engine. He's right. I missed out on some vastly important events in Prim's life because Katniss kept her a secret. She kept my child from me. My lightness suddenly seems absurd.

I scratch my head, these newfound thoughts marinating deep in the base of my skull. "Gale, I've gotta go. I'm staying with Katniss tonight, I think. We have some stuff to talk about."

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."

I hang up and slip my phone back into my pocket. Fuck, he was right. I whip open my door and run up the walkway. Again, Katniss opens the door before I can knock.

"Is there somewhere we can talk without fear of waking her up?" I whisper, foregoing the formal hellos.

"Uh, yeah. My bedroom is pretty soundproof. We should be okay."

I nod and she takes me down the same hallway, but this time we enter the room at the beginning of the hallway instead of the end. Katniss's room is large, with blue painted walls and a large, tall bed with a light blue comforter on it. Nothing else seems to be unpacked, still in the boxes in the corner of the room. She sits down on her bed and pats the spot next to her, but I shake my head and begin to pace back and forth.

"I need answers," I tell her simply.

She takes a deep breath and exhales loudly, her shoulders rising and falling dramatically. "Okay. Ask away."

And then I just lose it.

"How could keep her from me? For two fucking years!" I scream.

She sighs, seemingly unfazed, and runs a hand through her loose hair. I love it when it's loose. "Peeta, I don't have a good excuse."

I shake thoughts of combing my fingers through her silky hair out of my head and get angry again. "You realize how selfish that is, right? I missed everything for two years! Her birth, her first steps, her first diaper change, her first smile, her first everything!"

"Peeta, I—"

"No." I turn to her and stop my pacing. "How could you do that to me? I know you broke up with me, but I never thought you hated me."

Her eyes widen. "I don't hate you—I've never hated you! I found out I was pregnant not even a month after I had settled in Los Angeles. And I couldn't just quit and tell you and move back to you. Or have you uproot your life. You'd just inherited your bakery and I wasn't going to take you away from that—it was your dream. And my job in LA was my dream."

"Well, what changed? It's been two and a half years. Why are you back now?"

"I told you, I missed home. And I want Prim to have a father," she whispers, biting on her lower lip. She's obviously hiding something; but I ignore that for right now and continue my interrogation.

"What about your dream job?"

She shakes her head. "It wasn't as dreamy as I thought—being a music executive. I made good money but that was the only benefit."

I take a shaky breath and ask the question I've been dying to ask since the second I saw her. "What about us? Did you think about us at all?"

She glares at me again. I'm getting really fucking sick of that glare. How can she be upset with me about anything? "Peeta, I had your fucking daughter!" she screams, startling me. "I think about you every time I look at her! I think about how terribly I treated you and how badly I wish you knew about her. How I miss your touch and your smile and your love. And how I never deserved you!"

I look at her, utterly shocked. She's never said anything like this before. Katniss never once in our entire relationship said anything similar. But if she really felt all that, why didn't she say yet? Better yet, is that why she left?

"Dammit, Katniss, I loved you. More than anything in this world. I wanted to spend the rest of my life, every minute of it, with you in my arms. And you just left me. One minute we were having sex and the next you told me you were moving to LA." My hands clench my t-shirt, willing the anger to dissipate even a little bit.

"I wasn't ready for all that, Peeta. I wasn't ready for marriage and kids—"

"But you had a kid! My kid!" I shout, exploding. She's gonna throw that in my face after what she has raised, just down the hall from us. "You're a fucking hypocrite."

Her silver, all telling eyes flash with sorrow. But I _can't_ bow down to them like I have so many times in the past. She fucked up. I'm not gonna feel sorry for her.

But the sorrow fades as quickly as it appeared. She glowers at me instead. "I didn't plan on that." She stands up off the bed, her body vibrating in anger, her hands pulling at her roots. "I wanted to forget about you and try to move on! But I can't. You're under my skin and you won't get out!" she screams, voice cracking.

I laugh, incredulous. Un-fucking-believable. She's gonna use that shit on _me_? "Katniss, I've loved you since I was six years old. Do you think I've ever wanted to be with anyone else? I've tried, but no one fucking compares to you!"

Suddenly, she rips her shirt off over her head and throws it on the ground. "I need you, Peeta. Fuck me. Right here. Right now." She unclasps her bra and tears in down her arms, letting in fall to the ground next to her shirt.

I stare at her in shock. Is she fucking crazy? Does she really think that having sex is gonna solve anything? That's it's going to make up for making me so miserable for the last two and a half years and keeping my own flesh and blood from me?

But I can't help it. My body betrays me; my mind fades into nothing, no anger, no malice. Just lust. Before I can even fully realize what I'm doing, my hands grabbing her thick waves and my lips are crashing into hers.

And she kisses me back. Oh, sweet fucking Lord, does she kiss me back. Her tongue dives into my mouth, sliding against mine as we create a furious battle for dominance. But I'm gonna win. She's left me waiting for too fucking long and it's finally time for me to get what I want.

I bite her lip—hard—yearning a groan and gasp from her, before I pull away. Her eyes exploding with desire, I pick her up and toss her on the bed. I crawl on top of her before she's completely settled on her back and attack her neck, nibbling and sucking and kissing at the sensitive skin. She loves this, loves my mouth here, making her whimper and moan; and fuck, so do I.

Katniss pulls at my shirt and I lean back so she can tear it off and throw it behind me. She runs her fingernails down my bare chest and I thrust into her, my body reacting to her touch after so long. She gasps at the friction and pinches my nibbles, causing me to thrust again. God, she gets me so fucking hard. She smirks knowingly, remarkably still aware of the effect she has on me, has always had on me. Then she deftly begins to unzip my jeans. I move my hands to her perfect, perky breasts, my thumbs gravitating towards around her hard, dusky nipples. Her chest is a little bit larger than I remember, obviously from having our kid, and I pinch her nipples back, hard and long.

"Oh, Peeta, God," she gasps into the air. I fall back onto her, claiming her mouth again. So fucking sweet, like strawberries and honey, and so fucking wet; the image of it wrapped around my cock instantly springs into my mind. But that will have to wait. I need her pussy. Now.

I jump off the bed for only a moment to rip my pants and boxers of the rest of the way off my legs, finishing what Katniss started. When I'm done, I strip Katniss out of her grey sweats and the white cotton underwear she's always worn and throw them off the bed too. Her silver eyes are hungry and she licks her lips as I crawl between her thighs. I leap back on the bed and kiss her, rough and frenzied, her fingers diving into my hair, nails scratching down my scalp.

I pull away from her lips and begin to kiss down her perfect, tan body. Down past her collarbone, I stop at her breasts, popping her left nipple in my mouth and sucking on it hard. Her back arches as I bite the tip with my teeth.

"Oh, fuck!" she moans, running her hands through my hair again. I chuckle against her breast, relishing in what I'm still able to do to her. She's not the only one who can have an effect.

But quickly, unable to hold back any longer, I slink down to where I've always loved to go.

I kiss the inside of her thigh, sucking on the skin, and she writhes beneath me. She's always hated the teasing, but it's my favorite part. I love to toy with her until she's begging me to take her. I lick up and down her thighs while she tosses around, gasping. And then, without warning, I put my mouth where she wants it. My tongue thrusts into her slick folds and she arches again, pushing my face closer to her, moaning loudly. And I can't help but moan to. Fuck, I've missed her taste, the sweet tang exploding my taste buds, assaulting my senses. I massage her silky walls with my tongue, pulling the sweetness into my mouth, discovering every ripple and crevice of her warm heat all over again. She quivers around my tongue, so close already. She's desperate for it, desperate for me. So I won't keep her waiting. I suction my mouth around her clit and suck it hard as I plunge my two my fingers deep into her.

"Oh, fuck, Peeta. That feels so good. I've missed this so much." She holds my face between her thighs and I pump my fingers furiously into her, curling them upwards so they hit her sweet spot. I can feel her building around my fingers, squeezing me tighter and tighter, rippling and gripping. Then, right when she's at the edge, I nip her clit with my teeth.

She comes, squeezing around my fingers like a fist, shouting my name into the night.

I lap up her wetness, her trembling slowly fading against my tongue. When I finally look up to her again, she looks down at me with hooded lids, a sated smile on her face. I crawl back up her body, sucking her nipples again momentarily; and when I reach her face, I kiss her—thrusting my tongue in her perfect, wet mouth. She kisses me back like a starving man; I know she can taste herself and it turns me on even more.

I pull away and tuck a stray hair behind her ear, grinning so wide my cheeks ache. She looks so beautiful right now, her cheeks red, her bangs stuck to her forehead with sweat. And I need to be with her again. I move to get a condom from my wallet but she grabs my shoulders, shaking her head.

"No. Don't use anything—I'm still on the pill. I just want to feel your come inside me," she moans, licking her lips. I twitch against her thigh. Fuck me. I'm about to come and I haven't even slipped inside her yet.

"I don't know, Katniss. Isn't that how we got our daughter?" I ask, humor in my tone, but I'm also worried. She narrows her eyes at me and slides her hand down my chest until she grabs my cock in her hand. She runs her palm over the head and then squeezes me tightly; I let out a loud moan. Then she rubs the head up and down her soft, slick folds.

"Either you take me without a condom or you don't take me at all," she tells me, using her stern voice.

"Fuck, you're sexy," I gasp. She halts her ministrations and brings her hand back to cup my face. She slips her tongue out of her mouth and runs the tip of it along my upper lip. I groan. I always loved it when she did that and she knows it. "Fine. You asked for it."

I lean back on my heels, and pull her closer to me, opening her up so I can watch myself pump into her. And then slowly, I push my cock into her until I'm completely buried inside. I moan her name into the air, already holding myself back from finishing too soon. It's even better than I remember; it's fucking nirvana.

Slowly, withdraw and push myself into her, then pause again.

"Peeta, faster," she growls, her face flushed.

"No. I want it slow. I've waited for this for almost three years, Katniss." I pull out of her again and start the slowest rhythm known to man. She moans and wiggles under me, trying to get me to pump faster, but I won't do it. I want to cherish this.

I let my hands roam across her body, trying to imprint every single moment of this in my mind. She looks at me, her grey eyes open and hungry. The skin from the top of her breasts all the way to her forehead a beautiful flushed red shade. She's so fucking perfect.

I dreamed about being with her again so many times these past years, but never did I imagine it would feel like this. Not the amazing part—that was a guarantee—but the connection. It feels like there was never a gap, never a break in our love or intimacy. It's as if I'm transported back in time, back when we were happy and young and Katniss used to maul me with kisses in random places, with the excuse that she loved me so much that it couldn't be contained. When she would plop down on the couch next to me, tell me she wanted to get fucked, and we would do exactly that. When she should spend the whole day teasing me with glares and lip licks and panty flashes until I couldn't hold back any longer and threw her down on the coffee table. I feel like a twenty-one year old kid who finally got the girl, after so long of loving her from afar.

I fall back down on her, craving the feeling on her skin against mine. She immediately wraps her arms around my back, tucking her head into my shoulder. The shift in position makes her clench around me, brings me closer to the edge, but I grit my teeth and power through. I love her. I've always loved her. And right now, in this moment, I finally get to feel that love again. I don't know when she'll change her mind and leave me alone and broken again. But as long as we are connected, she can't. I can pretend that she loves me back.

But all amazing things have to come to an end. I try to hold back, but soon I feel her start to quiver underneath me. I move my hand between us and begin to rub her nub furiously, egging her on. She screams my name and suddenly climaxes, her muscles rippling around me. And I can't hold back. I've wanted this for too long and she takes me with her. I twitch inside her, filling her as we finish together with slow strokes, rubbing out our orgasms together.

I collapse on top of her, being careful not crush her, and bury my face in her neck. Every other girl I've been with can't compare to this. To her. We're perfect. Making love to her is the one thing in this world that makes sense. Being with her in general is.

She runs her hands up and down my back and we pant together, our sweaty bodies pressed together. "You're still the only person I've been with, Peeta," she whispers into my ear after a while. "And I know I'm not that person for you anymore, but I just wanted you to know."

I pull away from her neck and see her nibbling on her lip. My heart clenching in my chest, I tell her honestly, "You're the only one that has ever mattered, Katniss. You're the only one who's made me feel alive. The only one I've loved." Her grey eyes fill with insecurity; I lean down and kiss her soft lips again, sighing into her mouth.

Soft crying breaks the silence of the room and I pull away from Katniss, turning my head to find the source. The baby monitor, of course, placed on her nightstand next to a beat up copy of _Persuasion._

I instantly slip myself out of Katniss, my release falling on the sheets in a sticky waterfall, and jump out of bed. I grab my discarded boxers from the floor and pull them back on, excitement filling my veins.

"Can I get her?" I ask, a little eager. She opens her mouth and I cut her off before she can say a word, "I know I've never done it before, but if she won't stop crying or whatever, I'll come and get you. I just want to try."

Face softening, she nods her head. I lean over the bed, press another kiss to her mouth and run out of the room and down the hall before she can change her mind.

I find Prim sitting up in her crib, wailing and I run to her. I gently pick her up and cradle her as best as I can. I know she's not a baby, but she fits in my long arms, and I like the feeling of her soft curls against my skin.

"Shhh, it's okay Prim. You'll be okay," I coo, trying to get her to calm down. She looks up at me, tears streaming down her face, and instantly begins to relax, her cries quieting. I hum a soft song, probably off key, but it seems to soothe her anyway.

After about five minutes, her cries have stopped entirely, and her eyelids have begun to droop again. I lean down and kiss her forehead. She's so damn perfect it makes me want to squeal with delight. My little girl. Mine.

When I'm sure she's asleep, I gently place her back in her crib. I wait a few more minutes, staring down at her sleeping form before I creep out of the room and back to Katniss. She's wearing my shirt and tucked under the covers, no longer on top of them like she was when we made love.

"Impressive," she says, as I slip into bed next to her. "Prim normally takes about twenty minutes to calm down in the middle of the night."

I shrug my shoulders in nonchalance, but I feel anything but. That moment was…incredible. "She's amazing. You did a great job raising her," I say instead.

Her eyes glistening, she leans forward and gives me a small kiss. I fall back on the pillows and pull her to my side, yawning loudly. She places her hand on my chest and yawns too.

It doesn't take long before Katniss drifts off to sleep, her soft snores filling the small room. But I'm wide awake, my chest tight.

As much as I loved being with her again, she hurt me so much when she left me and I'm not sure if I can forgive her yet for that. Or for Prim. And we still need to talk about everything. Us. Prim. The past. The future.

What the fuck did I just do?

* * *

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